It’s not uncommon for wedding pictures to end up on other people’s social media pages before the bride and groom say “I do”. While well-intentioned friends are just sharing a special moment, it may not be the bride and groom’s wish to have their wedding uploaded to Pinterest or Facebook before previewing and consenting to the wedding posts. I am sharing some recent social media etiquette at weddings Q & A’s; it is my hope the answers will be helpful to those planning and attending a wedding in the near future.
Q: Would it be in poor taste to ask my friends and family to refrain from posting photos of my wedding ceremony on social media? I’d like to be the first to share my moment with my social media friends, and would rather those photos be those taken by our professional photographer.
A: This is absolutely understandable given the amount of time and money that goes into planning the perfect wedding, including hiring your own professional photographer. If you anticipate a problem, consider a sign that reads, “We hope you join us in unplugging for our wedding. We invite everyone to be fully present during the ceremony. Please turn off all cellphones and cameras. Thank you.”
Q: I want to post a picture of my wedding invitation, and a few thoughts I have on decorations, on my Facebook page. How can I share my excitement without offending friends who we simply did not have enough room to invite?
A: I suggest creating a Pinterest board with a few of your inspirations and saving most of the photos for a blog reveal post or social media album after your big day. This will allow you to catalog your wedding, while not being too forward about your plans. It may not completely eliminate hurt feelings, but it will be less offensive to those who are not invited to your upcoming wedding.
Q: My fiancé and I are huge supporters of social media, and want to make our wedding as interactive as possible for our guests. How can we incorporate hashtags and social media to connect our friends and family?
A: If you are open to connecting on social media before, during and after your wedding, and want to encourage your guests to get involved, have someone in the wedding party make a quick announcement before the wedding, welcoming your guests to share on their social media accounts. Encourage them to use a hashtag such as #smithwedding, with any Instagram, Twitter or Facebook post. Mashable has an article that has more suggestions for this type of occasion.
Q: After attending a friend’s wedding, I was tagged on Facebook in a few unflattering photos from the dance floor, any suggestions?
A: Reception photos (especially those snapped from the dance floor) are often amusing – unless you are the one front and center. If you are unhappy with a photo, ask your friend to please untag you from the picture. In general, it’s always a courtesy to ask if anyone has a problem being tagged without prior knowledge. Keep your Facebook notifications turned “on” so you’ll be alerted by smartphone when tagging occurs. Then, follow these steps if you want to untag yourself. A simple change allows tagged photos to be hidden from your timeline, but the photos will still display in the newsfeed depending on the sharing settings from the originator.
Q: I was invited to a wedding, declined, and chose to go to another friend’s event instead. After being tagged in our mutual friend’s Facebook page (a fellow coworker), the newly married couple found out I chose the other friend’s event over theirs. Should I address the situation or let it go? They haven’t said anything to me, but mentioned it to a fellow coworker.
A: If you properly declined their wedding invitation by RSVPing “no,” you shouldn’t feel uncomfortable and don’t owe them an explanation. However, if you embellished the truth (a.k.a. told a lie), and said you were driving your grandmother to her brother’s 85th birthday party, the proper thing would be to address the situation by apologizing to your coworker for not being upfront with your plans. Lesson learned.