Restaurant Etiquette: 10 Things Wait Staff Can Do to Keep Customers Happy

Waiting tables may look easy, but it can be very stressful.  From remembering drink orders, carrying a 20 pound tray of food, or dealing with unfriendly guests, the job can be challenging.  Here are a few tips that will keep customers happy and servers on their professional toes.

Tips for Servers:

1.  Please stand up.  Although it may seem more personable to kneel next to your customer, and studies show you get a better tip, it may actually give the impression of being “overly familiar.”  While some customers may not mind you being in close proximity, others may get put off by their server getting so close.  Show you are genuinely engaged by offering your name, and giving your customer an authentic smile and friendly greeting.  (Customers: Show your server respect by making eye contact and responding to his or her greeting. Don’t put your server in the awkward position of requesting they sit and visit while he or she is trying to attend to several other tables.)

2.  Keep your hands to yourself.  Studies also suggest that touching the customer in an obviously non sexual manner builds a connection and illicits a better tip.  Etiquette says you should listen to your mother’s advice and “keep your hands to yourself.”  Unless your customer is clearly lunging forward for a hug or kiss, refrain from touching, patting or kissing.  Your general manager may reach out for a handshake but your hands are touching food and you are held to a different set of rules.  I would never recommend refusing a handshake or hug from a customer, but I do discourage being the first one to extend your hand in a restaurant environment.  (Customers: Don’t touch your server to get his or her attention.)

3.  Pull your hair back.  The last thing a customer wants to see is a server running his or her hands through their hair, or rolling it behind their ears to keep it from falling forward in their face.  Tie it back and keep customers happy by keeping your long ponytail out of the Lobster Bisque.  (Customers: If you want to brush your hair or freshen up your makeup, excuse yourself to the restroom.)

4.  Spit out your gum.  Save the smacking, popping and blowing bubbles for after hours. Customers expect a professional demeanor, which does not include gum chewing.  (Customers: Don’t thoughtlessly put your used chewing gum on the rim of the plate or wadded up in the linen napkin.)

5.  Don’t make direct contact with the door knob after washing your hands.  It goes without saying that restaurant staff must be diligent hand washers.  I recently shared a powder room sink with a server that was meticulous about washing her hands.  She used hot water, dried her hands with the hand blower, but then proceeded to grab the nasty restroom handle and walk through the door.  All efforts at germ free hands were thwarted! Use a paper towel to touch or grab the door handle.  (Customers: Servers and restaurant staff are not the only ones that are responsible for using good hygiene.  Wash your hands!)

6.  Pay attention to where you place your fingers.  Make sure your fingers do not touch the rim of the glass, or leave a thumb print on the dinner plate you are serving the customer.  It’s unappetizing to eat from a plate with someone else’s finger marks left behind so be aware and take the necessary precautions.  (Customers: Don’t attempt to help the server by stacking the dishes or passing them to the server when you are through eating.)

7.  “No” to using your nose.  Under no circumstances should you “smell” a drink if you arrive at the table and can’t remember which similar looking dark liquid belongs to what customer.  A more professional option is to own the confusion, take the drinks back to the kitchen and start all over.  (Customers: When your food arrives, refrain from smelling it to see if it is “fresh.”)

8.  If you’re sick, please go home.  Rather than sniffling and fighting back a cough, the courteous thing to do is find someone that can switch shifts with you until you are fever free and feeling better.  (Customers: If you or your children are clearly feverish, coughing, or visibly sick, please stay home and enjoy a night out another day.)

9.  Keep your fingers off the French fries.  Under no circumstances should you take a taste from either a plate coming out of the kitchen, or a plate going back to the kitchen. You may think you are safely out of sight, but someone is always looking.  (Customers: Unless offered by the server, don’t ask for “just a taste” of a menu item that you don’t intend to order.)

10.  Always bring back the change.  Even if it is only 23 cents, unless the customer tells you otherwise, bring back every penny.  (Customers: It is the lowest form of civility to leave only a few cents, or skip a tip completely, even if you have received extremely poor service.  The etiquette rule is to leave a minimum of 10% and speak to the manager about the poor service.)