13 Lessons Kids Learn from Their Parents

Parenting is such an important job.

It’s almost overwhelming to comprehend that between casual playdates, weekly sports practices, evening dinner and nightly homework, you are shaping the future of human civilization.

In families, as in business, leadership starts at the top. The choices you make and the behavior you choose is directly influencing your child. Here are 13 lessons kids learn from their parents, along with thoughts on modeling behavior that enriches your child’s life – and your own.

Health

If you want your child to value physical wellness, modeling it yourself is a great place to start. Regularly eating junk food, being sedentary or skimping on sleep sends your child the message that taking care of yourself is not a priority. When you make eating healthy, working out regularly and getting enough rest a priority, kids will pick up on your message.

Finances

Consider what your kids are learning by watching your spending habits. Saving money for the future, living within your means, avoiding debt, budgeting and identifying wants vs. needs helps older kids understand the concepts of working for what they want and making smart decisions. Simple things like saving a percentage of every allowance or birthday check can help establish good habits for a lifetime.

Generosity

One of life’s most important lessons is how you treat others. Emphasizing the value of giving to those less fortunate, volunteering for a cause and supporting those in times of need are lessons that will last a lifetime.  

Courage

Whether it’s a new career, lifestyle or spiritual journey, courage is where it all begins. And while it’s easy to feel uncertain about possible outcomes, it’s even easier for your mind to respond with fear. Be a model to your children by challenging yourself to put the fear aside and take the first steps forward. They’ll start to see the superhero in you and will be encouraged to find it within themselves.   

Listen

Listening to your child without judgment or lecturing is one of the clearest paths to a great relationship. In addition to opening up communication with your children, giving them your full attention shows them how it feels to be heard, which helps them become better listeners.

Empathy

This is the capacity to understand how someone else feels. It’s different than pitying or commiserating with others; it’s putting yourself in someone else’s shoes to understand how they feel. This is a valuable skill when working with others, dealing with differences of opinion or simply being a good friend.

Handling Conflict

Everyone faces disagreements with others at times; your children are learning how to respond to them by watching your response. Do you go high when they go low? Are you showing your children how to handle conflict with dignity and restraint, or by losing their temper and engaging in shouting matches?

Tolerance

Even at the earliest ages, people are aware and sometimes very honest about differences they notice between themselves and others. When your child has a question about why their classmate wears glasses or why your neighbor walks with a cane, don’t be so quick to silence them. Acknowledging those differences and showing acceptance helps your child build an openness and respect for diversity.

Resilience

Life is a cycle of achievements and disappointments, joys and frustrations, but it must always be a pursuit of growth. Teach your children that the result of every experience is either success or education. As Thomas Edison said, “I didn’t fail. I just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” The only failure is only in not trying.

Optimism

To go through life with a positive outlook, hoping for and expecting the best, is to be a blessing to yourself and those around you. It’s not always easy – if it were, there wouldn’t be countless books on positive thinking. But it’s linked to multiple benefits, including health, confidence, success and simple enjoyment of life. Whether you’re an Eeyore or a Tigger by nature, it’s worth cultivating your inner optimist to pass these benefits along to your children.

Patience

Do you honk at the driver in front of you only a split second after the light has turned green? Or do you find yourself rolling your eyes when the cashier engages in friendly conversation with the customer ahead of you at the checkout? Be honest. If that’s how you respond to life’s minor delays, you can guarantee your kids notice. Consider evaluating your response and challenge yourself and your kids to handle these often frustrating moments with grace. After all, patience not only builds character, but it also leads to smarter decision making, promotes civility and even increases your capacity for success.

Curiosity

This quality may seem less appealing when your kid bombards you with an endless series of questions, but it’s actually one of the secrets of the world’s most successful people. They are always learning. Cultivate curiosity in your life and your child’s by going on new adventures, interviewing grandparents about their lives, discussing issues and asking opinions at the dinner table.

Fun

Kids pursue fun as a way of life. As a parent, the best thing you can do is follow your kid’s lead. If you seldom take time to pursue your own idea of fun beyond watching your favorite TV show, you owe it to yourself and your child to pursue joy. Look for ways to say yes to fun and adventure.

For more of Diane’s etiquette tips, you may enjoy Parenting Etiquette: Don’t Be a Helicopter Parent. Read her posts on Inc., and HuffPost, “like” The Protocol School of Texas on Facebook, and follow her on Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter. Diane’s latest book, Modern Etiquette for a Better Life is available on Amazon.