14 Wedding Traditions You Can Skip

When it comes to planning a wedding, most couples strive to leave a unique mark on their big day.

Whether it’s an extravagant groom’s cake, a pair of amazing bride’s heels or an eclectic bridal party, couples are breaking free from traditional customs, opting for a more modern twist on their wedding day.

Diamond Wedding Ring

While a diamond engagement ring is a classic, it’s definitely not the choice for everyone. Jewelers have expanded their selections to include various settings and stones such as emeralds, rubies and sapphires. Whether your taste is minimalistic or extravagant, you can customize your rings, creating a keepsake that is reflective of your personalities as a couple.

 Veil and Gown

With barn, backyard and destination weddings on the rise, ceremonies are becoming more light and casual. Styles have evolved to keep up with the growing trend. As brides choose dresses with shorter hemlines, they are also ditching the train and veil for a pretty floral crown or decorative piece of hair jewelry, creating a fresh take to the age-old tradition.

Parents Covering the Cost

This tradition dates back centuries when the bride was leaving her parents’ household to make a new home with her betrothed. Because the bride wasn’t expected to work, the costs of the wedding were taken care of by her parents. Today, some couples still observe this tradition, with some cultures even encouraging family members and friends to sponsor certain elements of the wedding. However, working couples often pay for their wedding expenses from their own pockets.

Only Family and Attendants Are Invited to the Rehearsal Dinner

With out-of-town ceremonies and destination weddings on the rise, rehearsal dinner guestlists have now grown to include wedding guests who have traveled from out of town. The rehearsal dinner is the perfect opportunity to share your gratitude with your guests for attending in case you do not have the chance to have s lengthy chat at the reception.

Designated Table Up Front

Typically, there is a table where the newlyweds are expected to sit with the wedding party during the reception. However, couples may want to choose to sit at a larger table with family and close friends. Most couples spend their evening “on the move”, greeting and thanking their guests for their support and participation.

Not Seeing the Bride Before the Wedding

This tradition started long ago based on a superstition that a groom seeing his bride in her gown before the ceremony would bring bad luck to their marriage. However, more couples are rejecting the idea and opting for a few pictures before the day gets chaotic.

Garter and Bouquet Toss

This tradition is strictly optional and guests can decide if they want to participate or not. Many modern brides even choose to forego wearing a garter altogether.

 Bridesmaids Dress All the Same

Gone are the days when bridesmaids are expected to wear matching dresses. Brides are allowing their attendants to select dresses that show off their individual personalities, tastes and body types.

No Black

While black attire has traditionally been reserved for funerals, the truth is that black is an often flattering, universal color. Because it looks good on almost every body type and complexion, it’s difficult to avoid, especially for evening wear.

When contemplating black, consider the time of the ceremony and the formality of the event. If the wedding is “Black Tie”, by all means, choose a festive black dress. If the ceremony is in the early afternoon, however, consider a lighter color that is cheerful and celebratory.

Social Media

Although it is the era of social media, many millennials are choosing “unplugged” weddings, requesting that guests turn off their phones and tablets prior to the ceremony. This requires guests to not only be fully present and experience the occasion as it happens, but it lets the photographer be the only individual shooting photos and allows them to do so uninterrupted. Should you be invited to an “unplugged” ceremony, respect the couple’s wishes by turning your cell phone off and keeping it out of sight, surely you can wait until the reception to snap a photo to post.

Rice Toss Exit

The ancient Romans and Greeks believed that rice, which symbolized fertility and prosperity, would radiate these energies for the newlyweds. Rice and grain have since been the confetti of choice for the ceremony departure. Today, wedding guests may blow bubbles, toss confetti, ring bells or wave sparklers creating a fun memory for everyone involved.

Decorating the Car

You’ve seen it dozens of times, whether on the big screen or in real life—the newlyweds get into a car with big white letters that say “just married.” And as they drive off into the sunset, balloons, streamers, and aluminum cans drag on the road behind them. If the tradition doesn’t feel right for you, feel free to scrap it. You may decide you prefer to call an Uber, rent a horse-drawn carriage or a vintage Rolls Royce, allowing someone else to take the reins so you and your spouse can sit back and enjoy the ride.

Gift Registry

It’s not uncommon to attend a wedding at which the couple has chosen to forego the traditional gift registry. Instead, many are choosing to have cash registries from which guests can help pay for their honeymoon or help them save for a house payment. Others even request that guests make a donation to the couple’s favorite charitable organization instead.

Honeymoon

Many newlyweds are choosing to pass on the extravagant 10-day honeymoon because it just isn’t practical. Instead, couples are choosing to take two or more, smaller trips when their work schedules allow. Consider planning your trips around weekends and holidays in order to make the most of your time off.

You may also like Wedding Etiquette: Thank You Notes. For more of Diane’s etiquette tips read her posts on Inc., subscribe to her articles on HuffPost, “like” The Protocol School of Texas on Facebook, and follow her on Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter. Buy her new book, Modern Etiquette for a Better Life.