Socially Distant Entertaining Etiquette

Large gatherings with friends have been put on hold during the coronavirus pandemic and celebrations have been postponed or canceled. I recently received a message from someone who was invited to a close friend’s home for a very intimate backyard social distancing celebration. The host assured everyone ahead of time that there would be ample space between the guests when seated and there would be no more than eight people in attendance. When she arrived, there were at a minimum, 40 guests, lines at the buffet table and a large number of visibly shaken guests. The conversations soon turned to anger towards the host who had invited a group of virtual strangers to mix and mingle during a pandemic. What should you consider when entertaining during a pandemic?

Prepare and Precaution

Before opening your social calendar up to host a full-blown party, consider a virtual celebration or a small group of family or friends where you can manage each guest’s proximity. Set up a long table and seat people at opposite ends when dining. Place casual seating strategically so there is no confusion about where you want people to visit. Display baskets of new masks in case someone needs to use them. Masks get lost in the car and it’s easy to break the ear band off of a perfectly good mask. Make sure to have several hand sanitizing areas and set out a tray of disposable finger towels in the guest powder room to eliminate the use and reuse of the same hand towel.

Make individual platters and have pretty, disposable plates and cutlery available for each couple or family. They will have their own food and serving pieces and won’t have to handle anyone else’s during the meal. Include salt and pepper packages, along with mini condiments to add to their personal collection of foods.

If you are sitting outside, have plenty of bug spray and outdoor fans. Place a cooler filled with ice water and soft drinks nearby. You can purchase pre-made cocktails available in small cans. Offer individually wrapped straws to sip on the cold drinks.

Let People Know What To Expect

If you tell people you are having an “intimate gathering” and then change the game plan without warning, plan for some uncomfortable and unhappy guests. The role of a good host is to make their guests comfortable. Putting them at a health risk is not anyone’s idea of fun. As a guest, if you are uncomfortable, discreetly excuse yourself to talk to your host. Let them know you are feeling ill at ease. Thank them for the invitation but let them know you are going to have to leave. Ask the host to please not make a big deal of the reason for your departure. If the fellow guests all happen to be strangers, they won’t notice you are missing.

Speak Up

If you notice someone who is not wearing a mask, kindly ask them if they would please put their mask back on. This gesture is perfectly acceptable in light of the situation. Understandably, face masks may feel uncomfortable when socializing. But if the option is to wear a mask or worry about the hazard of exposure, take the risk of perhaps offending someone over getting sick. When you are in someone’s home and in a socially distant, safe proximity, most people will feel assured that the health and safety guidelines are being followed. Keep in mind, when you are out in public, there is never a 100% guarantee.

Add a Spark of Fun

There is nothing funny about the virus. But since everyone is going to have to wear a mask, why not do it with flair? Fall themed masks are coming out and birthday fabrics and patriotic prints are always conversation starters. Just stay away from anything political or offensive which may insult your host or other guests. A beautiful mask would make a great guest or hostess gift. Wow. Something I never thought I would have heard myself say several short months ago!

You might also like Face Mask Etiquette in the Age of COVID-19. For more of Diane’s etiquette tips read her posts on Inc., subscribe to her articles on The Huffington Post, “like” The Protocol School of Texas on Facebook, and follow her on Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter.