Diane Gottsman | Leading Etiquette Expert | Modern Manners Authority

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Masks Are Off and Confusion is High

08 Mar 2021 By: Diane Gottsman

In Texas, Governor Greg Abbott recently lifted the ban on masks and businesses will be free to open at 100% capacity on March 10. This causes relief for some and trepidation for many others. While businesses have suffered immeasurably over these past months, CDC continues to warn against letting our guard down. Governor Abbott’s decision has been met with criticism by political and health leaders as it contradicts health official’s advice, including the head of the CDC. It has also created conflict for many retailers and individuals who want to continue to remain vigilant in the fight against the virus. Masks are off for some, while others are unsure of next steps.

masks are off | couple in grocery store wearing masks

From an etiquette standpoint, I am being asked how to navigate the social and professional culture while attempting to stay safe and put others at ease. I am answering some of your questions below.

Mother Knows Best

Question: I am anxious to get back to a way of life before Covid-19 but I’m still not comfortable about the thought of going out in public without face protection. Will it hurt my chances of making a good impression if everyone is mask-free and I am wearing mine?

Answer: At the risk of sounding like your mother, “It shouldn’t matter.” What is most important at this time is to put yourself in a situation where you feel most comfortable. And continuing to take precautions to protect yourself and others. The CDC continues to emphasize safety, precaution, social distancing and wearing a mask.

Wedding Bells from a Distance

Question: I have been previously invited to a cousin’s wedding in a nearby town and declined due to the pandemic. She has read the news of businesses reopening and the mask ban being lifted in Texas and called me personally to ask me to reconsider coming to her wedding in a couple of months. She is a close family member, but I am just not ready to socialize in large groups. How do I word my decline without coming across as rude?

Answer: Be honest and sincere. Let your cousin know you love her, wish her well, but are not ready to socialize in large groups or be put in a situation where masks are off. Your cousin is sweet to reach out to you personally but will understand when you let her know you are continuing to social distance.

Find Other Friends

Question: I have a close friend who thinks I’m overreacting when it comes to wearing a face mask. Now, he cites the ban as further proof. I am getting tired of continually protecting myself from his snide remarks. Any recommendations?

Answer: Yes. Distance yourself from any friendship that puts you down or belittles you for a strong personal belief. Part of being a good friend is understanding that we all have different opinions. And respecting each other without making each other feel bad or criticizing your belief system. Much like differing on politics and religion, respect and understanding is the key to a strong relationship.  

Wear Your Mask Without Apology

Question: Is it rude to keep my mask on if other people have taken theirs off in a social situation. I don’t want to miss out on a social experience but I want to remain true to my convictions.

Answer: Absolutely not. These are unusual times, and we all have to learn how to navigate them with a new set of social decisions. Some businesses will still keep their restrictions in place (Starbucks and Target) and many people will continue to wear their masks. You will not be alone. Even if no one else is wearing a mask, as long as you are friendly and engaged, continue to speak up through your mask so people can hear you, feel confident to safely attend a social event continuing to use health precautions.

Finally, it’s not necessary to apologize for your decision. Many people feel the same way you do. And you will find there will be people on both sides of the masks who have the same common goal. To stay safe and be well. Wear your mask with pride!

CDC Update

Second vaccinations offer hope when visiting with friends and family, according to the CDC, fully immunized Americans can visit with low risk people from outside of their household even if they have not yet gotten the vaccine. Those with both doses of the vaccine can visit with each other, mask free indoors.

You may also like Dining Etiquette Has Changed Due to the Pandemic. For more of Diane’s etiquette tips, read her posts on Inc., subscribe to her articles on Huff Post, “like” The Protocol School of Texas on Facebook, and follow her on Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter. Buy her new book, Modern Etiquette for a Better Life.

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Diane Gottsman

Diane Gottsman is a national etiquette expert and modern manners professional, sought out industry leader, television personality, accomplished speaker, Huffington Post blogger, author, and the owner of The Protocol School of Texas, a company specializing in executive leadership and etiquette training. Diane is routinely quoted in national and international media including The New York Times, The BBC, CNN, Bloomberg Business Week, Kiplinger, Huffington Post Canada, U.S. News and World Report, and Forbes. She is the resident etiquette expert for two popular morning talk shows, SA Living and Good Day Austin. She has been seen on The TODAY Show, HLN Headline News, WGN Chicago, and CBS Sunday Morning. Her clients range from university students to Fortune 500 companies and her workshops cover topics ranging from tattoos in the workplace to technology at the dinner table and the proper use of social media.