Oversharing on Social Media & The Value of Discretion

Let’s face it – there really is no such thing as privacy. If someone wants to find out something about you, most often the answer is simply one click away. While the internet provides a vast amount of important information at the touch of a keyboard, it’s also an avenue to overshare every idle thought that pops into your head. There is a serious potential for danger and safety issues with kids oversharing information, but adults have their own reasons to zip it. Oversharing on social media carries consequences professionally and personally. The reality is people make judgments about you based on what you post.

While some people say they don’t care what others think, it’s important to note that bosses care and partners care. And others are watching as well. If your doctor were posting an unhinged rant online, you would probably have second thoughts about their judgment in other areas of their life.

Here are some reasons to steer clear of oversharing on social media: 

Breaking Up or Calling Out an Ex Online – You Don’t Look Like the Hero

Do people really think better of you when you set up your partner who has been cheating on you by writing on oversized note cards, set to sweet or upbeat music and watching their reaction as they “read” what they think is going to be a surprise love note that turns quickly into a “get lost – you’ve been caught” note? The answer is no. It’s offensive to watch as the person in the video insults the viewer’s intelligence, who is watching another adult set someone up, even when their partner was a jerk and may deserve a good breakup.

Two wrongs don’t make a right. I’ve watched them – sad to say, over and over – and realized I felt irritated at myself for wasting my own time. No one wins, not the post-er, not the person getting the boot, and not the one (me) watching the video. A proper breakup calls for a private conversation between the two people who are involved.

‘What’s On Your Mind’ is Simply a Prompt

Some platforms encourage oversharing on social media by asking, “What’s on your mind?” but that doesn’t always mean literally. If your cat threw up on the floor or your niece lost 4 pounds after a bout of the stomach flu, truly it adds no value to anyone other than you and maybe your mother. The desire to connect with other people is why people post online but think about the connection. The post-er may feel they are being “real,” and the reader has secretly unfollowed you or muted you temporarily and you are probably talking to yourself. The danger comes when people overshare the wrong information. 

A study conducted by ScienceDaily found that the risk of oversharing in conversation actually increases with age. The study says, “This is particularly important for older adults who are more susceptible to revealing private information”. This could be detrimental for many reasons, including their safety. If you have a family member who tends to share TMI, consider having a loving chat with them about your concern. You would do it for your kids. You should do it for your father or mother.

The Importance of Holding Off on a Post

People find themselves oversharing on social media for many different reasons. Everything from venting their emotions to seeking 60 seconds of fame, watching the likes and comments charge their batteries and invigorate them whether they are positive or adverse. Oversharing can have negative consequences that affect your personal life and your professional image. Before you post anything online or share anything with another person in person, think about the desired outcome. Careers have been broken by one ill-placed Tweet. Here are some tips on posting before you share your next thought:

Does your post serve a particular purpose?

If you are posting something because someone asked you to share a thought, it should align with your personal values. Promoting a product or service you don’t stand behind is inauthentic. Ask yourself if the post is thoughtful, helpful or doing good for someone else.

Is it true?

Whatever you say online can be fact-checked offline. Don’t ruin your reputation by posting a picture of yourself surfing when you are really afraid of getting in the water but you thought it would be a funny joke.

Will it come back to bite you?

Because if it can, it probably will. The aftermath of a thoughtless post could hurt your reputation and leave a lasting impression on your friends.

For more information check out The Protocol School of Texas. You may also like Simple Luxuries To Elevate Your Daily Routine. For more of Diane’s etiquette tips read her posts on Inc., subscribe to her articles on The Huffington Post, “like” The Protocol School of Texas on Facebook, and follow her on Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter.