Moving in Together: How to Successfully Merge Two Households

“Going to the chapel and we’re— gonna get married!”

Congratulations, you’re getting married this summer. What an exciting time!

As you are finalizing the plans for your wedding, you may also be planning to combine two fully-stocked homes. Although it may feel straightforward, there is so much to consider. If you don’t make time to plan out the process, it could end in unnecessary stress.

Melissa Rogers, owner of Modified by Melissa, is here to help! She’s sharing a few tips to help ensure your move is seamless. Here are her tips:

Prioritize

Take note of any pieces of furniture or items that have special meaning to you. Maybe something from your grandmother, or the first thing you bought with your own money. Determine if these pieces are “can’t live without” and non-negotiable. I recommend ranking these items by emotional value and referencing that should some compromises need to be made.

Make an Inventory

When moving in with your significant other, there is a high chance that you will have duplicate appliances, furniture and fixtures. So it’s best to start by each making an inventory and then comparing lists.

Discuss and Divide

Most likely, this will require both of you to have to let go of some personal belongings, such as furniture, appliances, etc. So it’s important to be open and understanding. When considering which items to keep or toss, it’s best to keep the discussion open and neutral. Try to focus on practicality over emotions, when making these decisions.

Some things to consider when deciding which items to keep or get rid of are:

• Duplicates
• The condition of each item
• Space considerations
• Style preferences

Do a Purge

Once you have an idea of what items you have multiples of, you can go back and purge or mark the ones you won’t be taking with you. As a measure of not making decisions in haste, do this step last. You can even start by “tagging” items being discarded first. Once you know for sure what will go, you can load up the car or schedule a donation pick up.

Saving Time and Money

Using these steps to help reduce the load one or both of you may be moving will help immensely, saving time and money in that final step— the actual move.

“When my now husband and I were planning our move, I was coming from another state. We started by inventorying our items and eliminating duplicates. It saved money and moving fees. I prioritized my belongings, packed them up, and shipped them to New Mexico! It actually felt pretty good to do a “cleansing” of my physical stuff.” ~ Melissa

Respect Each Other’s Preferences

Above all else, it’s important to practice patience throughout the experience. It can be a time when emotions are high. Compassion and understanding will go a long way.

Remember that both parties have had other lives and experiences before this moment and respecting one another’s ideas will help to ensure this transition is a smooth one. If you find you and your partner are struggling to make important decisions about what items to keep or purge; find a neutral third party to help facilitate the process. Choose someone who is a mutual friend or a professional – like Melissa!

For more of Diane’s etiquette tips, you may enjoy Creating a Home Office for Style and Function. Read her posts on Inc., and HuffPost, “like” The Protocol School of Texas on Facebook, and follow her on Pinterest, Instagram and Twitter. Diane’s latest book, Modern Etiquette for a Better Life is available on Amazon.